Only Connect

The Wall Street Journal had a story Tuesday entitled "Happy Couples Kiss and Tell." It looked at the secrets to longevity in marriage through the eyes of couples ranging from Sharon and Ozzy to Rosalynn and Jimmy - - the world of R&R to the world of Presidents. Several interesting points were made in the article - - important not only in the context of marriages but also in business, project teams, partnerships, and client/customer relationships.

Compromise gets you through the good times and the bad times. If each person can give 75%, you get 150%. Find the middle ground - - 95% of life is give and take. The "Longevity Bunch" understands that in life we are constantly faced with choices between incompatible aims that are maybe equally worthy but that cannot all be realized without a complex mixture of conflict resolution, compromise, and sacrifice. It is important to remember that compromise is a process that never becomes absolutely perfect.

Humor is important - - be funny, have a sense of humor and laugh. Find humor in situations and people. Take what you do and all your endeavors very seriously - - but don't take yourself too seriously. In the long run, we all end up in the same place. Look into the mirror and remember that empathy and caring are key to longevity.

Never give up - - perseverance is a tremendous quality. Go into any relationship and situation thinking this will be forever. Sometimes is just boils down to some combination of hard work and sheer blind luck.

Connecting is a central theme in the longevity race - - in the relationship business it is the key to launching and establishing lasting relationships. Approximately 80% of the people who fail at work do so for one reason: they do not relate well to other people. Finding common ground, a similar sense of humor or taste, or a mutual interest is where the foundation of relationship management resides.